Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Lots of projects going on....

Just a grand ol' update here!

Work) I have a new boss - the one that was driving me into an early grave has been removed from the company. Our new boss is going to gain control of our group in 2 more months - for right now we have the blessing of our old boss, he's one of my friends that came to Charlie Majors' birthday party - A&W is his married nickname. (he's the w)
I have had a LOT of work since returning from my medical leave, because it seems two or more coworkers are always out.

Home) I don't really want to talk about home - I haven't been able to do many of the daily tasks that need doing, and it is not a welcoming environment right now. We've bought veggies and fruit, and it keeps going bad because I never have the energy to cook anymore.

Church) Charlie and I went to Mass, and he behaved very well! I only had to bribe him with 4 treats, because he started vocally complaning about the length of the service, and I wanted to keep him silent. Father Ray gave me a hug and Charlie a pat on the head, and said how glad he was that I came back, and it's nice to meet Charlie. That made me feel really good, because I'm super self concious that people are going to be distracted by us as a team in Church - and the last thing I would ever want to do is draw attention away from worship!

Charlie and the cats) Charlie is still the bottom of the totem pole at both my parents' house and our apartment. Mayhem will sometimes snuggle up against his hiney if he and we pretend we don't see her doing it. Smokey and Mischief have NO use for him, and will swipe at him if he gets too close.
Charlie's picked up some new commands! "Circle" is the most useful one to me right now. If he is facing the opposite of the way I need him to be, I can tell him to circle and he will adjust himself! The other main one we're working on is commanding him to go to specific people, and to hold things in his mouth until I'm ready for it. He still helps me get dressed every day, and that has become something I rely on him for! It's a really huge thing to not need that help from my husband anymore.

Chronic Illnesses) Still waiting on the %&*# Cardiologist. I can't be tested for Epilepsy or Post Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome until I see him. The Geneticist refuses to answer my calls, so I still haven't been assessed with anything official other than his observations and the "diagnosis" from the Rheumatologist. I'm still feeling very faint when I am vertical, but I'm still having to drive myself to work, because I get to work at least 5 hours after my husband most of the week. My GP took me off caffiene and I have had such a killer headache since. I'm in major withdrawal. I cheated today and got a Sweet Tea from McDonalds, and Husband FREAKED out over it. "You're gonna collapse like you did last week! That cup will kill you!"
How does he waffle from not believing me to be ill, to believing and using some form of escape from facing reality, to facing reality and being sweet about it, and then freaking out about every single thing related to the management of my conditions? That baffles me. He can pick any of those moods at any moment.

Crafting projects) I am currently knitting a shawl and another pair of socks. This month I've made 2 complete pairs of socks, and several hexipuffs for my someday "Bee Keeper's Quilt" by Stephanie Dosen. I'm feeling productive with that, so that's something nice. I can knit while I'm working, because I do phone work and my supervisor said if I can prove my productivity and professional tone is not compromised that I may continue to do so. Yay! Knitting at work. Every knitter's dream, no?
I went to Stitches South with my Mom and met some of my best online friends! They're in the Posse. I didn't have much to spend, but I did splurge and buy myself a couple of ounces of super soft blended wool and tencel fiber. I'm hoping to spin up some special single ply fingering weight yarn to make into some hexipuffs.

That's all for now, I guess! I'm sorry I don't have any pictures for you! Someone (not sure if cats or dog) ate the power cord to my iPad, so it's without any power at the moment.

Saturday, April 26, 2014

Update from the doc....

So the update from the doc....I'm going to be tested for heart issues, epilepsy and post orthostatic tachycardia syndrome. So not one good option. Yay. Let's home we can figure it out! I'll be honest, I was hoping to hear him say it would be fixable by switching up my meds.

Charlie and I are about to walk out the door to head to mass. Wish us luck! The first foray back into the church was quite nerve wracking for us both. Me, because I was worried he would disturb others or otherwise distract from the service, and him because he wanted to obey, but really really wanted to investigate.

Thank you all for your support this week: my parents, Hollee, Janet, jenni, and my bitter infertile posse. I love you guys!



Wednesday, April 23, 2014

The space where I knit

Recently I was reading a thread on theknitgirllls' Ravelry group with pictures of the places you craft in. Lately I've been spending all my energy at work. I spend a lot of my day on the phone, waiting for it to pick up, and I have a headset so I knit while talking or waiting to talk.

Right now I'm working on socks and Lala's simple shawl. :)

I love my cubicle. It's super organized, and it's the cleanest of all the cube world around it. I have a board I pin cute things to, including a picture of Charlie on his birthday, and a picture of Benedict Cumberbatch with a quote about how he says he looks like a horse, and people think he looks like an otter. Basically my cube is my refuge from everything...except work. Lol!

So that's my primary knitting spot!

I was sent home today from work. I spent half an hour in a blood donor chair with my feet over my head. The faintness hasn't improved. I see the doc tomorrow.



Tuesday, April 22, 2014

The best part of the morning...

Is waking up to puppy kisses.


Charlie and I are fighting our way through another work week. 

Soapbox time!

If you're able to, please schedule a blood or platelet donation with your local blood bank! Sometimes us desk flunkies who see daily statistics worry that everyone thinks "I'll do that next month", or "they don't really need me, there's plenty of people donating.".....there's not always plenty of people donating, and we have to avoid using all of our assets for soliciting donations until the summer months when hospitals are crippled every day instead of every other week. Make being a hero a part of your routine. If you can't give, be a champion for giving! Let others know the need is real, and yes, Mr./Ms. Smith, we really need everyone who is willing. /soapbox

Onward!

Sunday, April 20, 2014

Happy Easter

I've spent this weekend in a voluntary vegetative state. I slept from Friday night at 10:30pm until yesterday at 6:30pm asleep. Husband made me food, cared for the animals and then we watched a movie about Steve jobs, played by Ashton kutcher. I fell asleep again before the movie was over, and woke up an hour ago.

Charlie took great care of me, cuddling and kissing me awake so I would feed him and take my pills.

           (Charlie is the Easter bunny!)
Have a happy Easter, everyone!

Friday, April 4, 2014

I just want to be ok



I have gone back to work and my former routine. I'm in need of the break I had as a permanent change, or I need a change in my medications to deal with it all. I'm sorry I haven't posted. I haven't taken any pictures lately either.

Charlie and I went to Mass for the first time last night. I tried to sit in a spot that wouldn't be a distraction to anyone. (Apparently it was our annual Return to Confession service) He did really well. I only had to stage whisper to him twice - other than that, he followed my hand signals for standing, sitting and laying down. The young mom in front of our pew accidentally dropped her container of cheerios for her toddler, and it spilled in front of charlie. He obeyed my whisper, even though he really wanted it, and he left the "treat" alone. Then, when it was time for private confession, apparently where I was sitting was to become a confessional for the guest priest, so Charlie and I left. There were so many people there, I knew I couldn't stand in line, and so I just left. I'm the first to admit to you I'm not a great Catholic, but God is a great God. I'm hoping he can understand and forgive me for not staying.

I've just been really depressed and depleted since my return to work. As soon as I got back, I had to catch up on everything I'd missed, and cover for a co-worker who is recovering from a double mastectomy. Then, unexpectedly, our part time coworker broke her leg in two places and is out, so I'm also doing her job. I'm not doing such a great work of any of it. On top of that, MetLife is refusing my application I submitted before my leave of absence, and I'm now owing the company 40+ hours of PTO I haven't even earned yet, otherwise I wouldn't get a paycheck. So now I'm united with my Supervisor and HR rep, arguing with MetLife that I AM eligible, and DID apply in time.

My Grandma's health keeps getting worse, my sister lost her job, my other sister is on the other half of the globe and I just want to be with them. I want to go back to childhood before my health made it so hard to move, and before I was ever depressed.

I'm sorry for no updates. I am trying.